Personality
Personality is not a flaw to be corrected. It is an old solution we keep applying to new problems, and new problems call for new strategies.
What we call personality is, to a large extent, a set of decisions made and repeated from a very early age, with the information we had, by a child doing the best they knew how. The problem is not the decision itself, but that it was never reviewed again.
Working on your personality isn’t about replacing it with another. It’s about restoring your ability to choose: recognising the automatic response as it happens and, in that “one-second” pause, being able to do things differently.
It is less spectacular than it seems in books, and more lasting than it seems at first. It is about changing a little at a time, but changing it for good.
- Separate you from the pattern
Start with the sentences you have been saying about yourself for twenty years without question.
- Find the cost
Every pattern protects you from something, and charges you for the protection.
- Work the gap
Between stimulus and reaction there is a space. Freedom lives there.
- Take it into real life
One difficult conversation is worth ten chapters.
Discover Your Personality with the Enneagram
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Coaching
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